Idle Worship

Musings From An Outspoken Observer
My bodega is so hood that they keep a baseball bat behind the chimichurri. You better respect their sandwich folding abilities. Subway’s got sandwich artists, Nadal’s has falafel gangbusters.

My bodega is so hood that they keep a baseball bat behind the chimichurri. You better respect their sandwich folding abilities. Subway’s got sandwich artists, Nadal’s has falafel gangbusters.

They’re filming the new SharkNado outside my day job today. Spoiler alert: it involves Ian Ziering in a cab. Other spoiler alert: it’s gonna suck.

They’re filming the new SharkNado outside my day job today. Spoiler alert: it involves Ian Ziering in a cab. Other spoiler alert: it’s gonna suck.

This was posted in a restroom in my office building. For grown adults. No kids work here. Grown adults don’t know how to pee and poop right. #america

This was posted in a restroom in my office building. For grown adults. No kids work here. Grown adults don’t know how to pee and poop right. #america

I did a show at an Elks lodge this weekend. There was a fight, the cops got called and someone was doing bumps of coke in the bathroom before the show even started. AND THERE WAS AN ELK HEAD IN THE GREEN ROOM.  Clubs don’t have nothing on an Elks lodge!

I did a show at an Elks lodge this weekend. There was a fight, the cops got called and someone was doing bumps of coke in the bathroom before the show even started. AND THERE WAS AN ELK HEAD IN THE GREEN ROOM. Clubs don’t have nothing on an Elks lodge!

I stole Milton’s stapler. #officespace

I stole Milton’s stapler. #officespace

This guy is fashioning the same pants Seal Team 6 used to infiltrate Grimace’s secret lair.

This guy is fashioning the same pants Seal Team 6 used to infiltrate Grimace’s secret lair.

They’re how you get good and famous at comedy, Sybil!

They’re how you get good and famous at comedy, Sybil!

My girl and I visited her college over the weekend. This sign explains why she’s so comfortable dressing like an Indigo Girl as an adult.

My girl and I visited her college over the weekend. This sign explains why she’s so comfortable dressing like an Indigo Girl as an adult.

I’m moving to Harlem on Friday so in honor of #tbt I’m giving a shout out to my new neighbor.

I’m moving to Harlem on Friday so in honor of #tbt I’m giving a shout out to my new neighbor.